When Gaurav joined the zoom call at the scheduled time, his coach was already there.
After the initial pleasantries, a short breathing exercise, and a prayer to get focused and energized, Gaurav and his coach began talking.
Coach: Gaurav, what is it that you want to talk about today?
Gaurav: Coach, I feel pulled in different directions by the different roles I play, and my responsibilities towards different stakeholders. At times, it is overwhelming. I find it difficult to balance all this- job and career growth, family, financials, health, relationships, and then make time for friends. In all this, I rarely find ‘me time’ to pursue my hobbies or my desire of spiritual growth. At times it feels like I am just rushing from one problem to another.
Coach: What else do you feel in this context?
Gaurav: I also feel a dissonance between where I am putting in efforts and my needs. Sometimes I think I am getting it wrong.
Coach: Gaurav, thanks for sharing this concern. So, can you summarise your objective from this coaching session in one line? Also, may I request you to write it down?
Gaurav (after some thought): To be able to balance different aspects of my life in a more effective and efficient way.
The Coach repeated the sentence and confirmed that he had got it right.
Coach: So Gaurav, given your objective, what is it that you are specifically expecting out of the session today?
Gaurav: I am looking for a tool or method that can help me balance my priorities and allow me to focus on them in a more appropriate manner.
Coach: Sure Gaurav. Have you heard of this tool called Wheel of Life or Circle of Life?
Gaurav: Of course, I have heard these terms, but am not aware of this tool, Coach.
Coach: This is what a standard circle of life look likes, with eight areas that represent aspects of life, which matter to most of us. These include health, career, finance (money), family, social, intellectual (growth and learning), spiritual, physical environment (home, office, transport). You can split categories to add something that is missing. You can also re-label areas to make it more relevant to you, for example, mental health, emotional well-being or relationship with their partner/significant other could be very important for some people and they may like to include those aspects.
Gaurav: Yes, for me, I would split health into physical health and mental health to ensure that I get a more complete perspective. Mental health is very important to me, as I feel stress saps a lot of my energy. Also, within family, I would carve out my relationship with my spouse as it affects my day-to-day life.
Coach: Sure, as you deem appropriate.
Gaurav: Coach, I must say, it is nice to see all things that matter in a small diagram. Suddenly, I seem to have a better hold of things!
Coach: (Smiles). Now Gaurav, rank your level of satisfaction with each area of your life by drawing a line across each segment. Place a value between 0 (completely dissatisfied) and 10 (fully satisfied) against each area. Think through each aspect deeply and then mark each segment. Also, once you have done the exercise, review it and feel free to change anything you want to. Take your time.
Gaurav takes about 10 minutes to do the exercise, review it, and make changes.
Coach: Did the exercise help you get a better perspective of things? Are there any surprises for you?
Gaurav: While the tool looks simple, I must admit, I have not thought of things like this in a while. It gives me a good and instant summary of how I feel about things that matter. And while it did not surprise me, it gave me more clarity of my pain points.
Coach: That is a great start Gaurav. Given that you spoke about dissonance between efforts and needs, you may like to do a similar exercise with the circle, ranking how much effort you are putting in each of these areas, and reviewing them.
Gaurav is done with this exercise in 5 minutes this time, and his face seems to show some realisation.
Coach: What did the exercise tell you, Gaurav?
Gaurav: Coach, I understand that I am putting a lot of time and effort into my job, and a reasonable effort in family, but I am clearly not doing enough for my health and my intellectual growth. When I combine both these charts, I realise the scope I have to improve things in terms of effort and ensure that my life is closer to where I want it to be.
Coach: Great Gaurav. Also, one way to get more out of this exercise is to delve deeper into each of these segments by thinking about what you can do to make each area better. We can do this in subsequent sessions, focusing on one area at a time.
Gaurav: Sure, coach. This looks elementary, but has been insightful. I am sure that deeper dive into each segment will only help me understand my life better.
Coach: Absolutely. In fact, you will find this to be a great tool to go back to, time and again, to help give a balanced view of life and ensure that you are aligning efforts in the right manner. Before we close this session, what are your key takeaways?
Gaurav: (Smiling) I think this exercise has made life feel more manageable than it otherwise felt! I also feel reflecting about life from different perspectives does add a dimension to your thought process. It is worth taking some time out to do this once in a while. I will spend some time today to go over this tool again, think deeper, and make notes, which I will share with you later.